How much is too much?

So I know that compared to a lot of parents these days I am pretty strict. I might be a little more lenient when my kids get older but for now I have rules. I may not always know why I instill these rules day after day but I do. I do wonder sometimes if I am too hard on my kids. I wonder if what I'm doing is going to affect them in a good way, a bad way, or not even at all. I know it is affecting them a little because when they go to someones house they are well mannered and far better behaved than at home.

I expect a lot out of my children. I will give them the tools to get what they want out of life so they need not to take it for granted. I want them to be polite, nice and generous to people. I want them to know that I love them more than anything. I want them to know that they can do whatever they put their minds to. A friend told me about her "can't jar" once. She said that when her daughters say they can't do something they have to put money into the jar. It has taught them to say I need help with this or I don't understand. I have taken on this learning tool into my own househeld without the actual jar. It would drive me insane when Austin says he can't do something. He has now learned to say I need help or I have a problem.

I don't want my children to get hurt. I want them to respect their things and people. I need them to understand these things so I made rules. For example, no running in the house, or you trip over daddys shoes and smack your face into the window ledge and get a huge cut in your face. Or books are for reading no throwing them around or I take them away and put them in the basement. These things are hard for me to enforce sometimes because they are having so much fun running in the house. They are also getting excersize. Taking away their books seems a little strange because now they have nothing to read and look at. But if they don't learn to respect them and use them the way they are supposed to what else are they going to wreck? It was hard for me to take away their books but I need them to understand that they can't just wreck things and not care. They might be a little young to understand this yet but one day they will, I hope!

I do these things because I love them and I want them to be great people one day. I can't let them get away with everything all the time because then they will never understand right from wrong. Kids will be kids, yes, but one day they will be adults.

There is a point in your life (and everyone is different) that for the most part you physically stop growing. Your mind never stops, so you are always learning and growing in that aspect but your body stops at some point (I googled it, anywhere between 18 and 25, apparently I'm not done yet lol).

After having children I watch them. I watch them learn and grow every day into these human beings that I created. Their personalities are developing as well as their mind. I wonder sometimes how I was ever that small. It's even crazier to think that one day they will be as big as I am, maybe even bigger. And one day even they might be where I am today, maybe not at the same age but one day they might have children of their own and a spouse who they love unconditionally.

I wonder what they will grow up to be. A plumber like Grant, a lawyer, a doctor, a dentist (like I wanted to be). They might be a teacher or a policeman. Whatever they will be I will love them no matter who they end up being because they are my children and I love them no matter what. Their jobs might not be as glorious as I just listed but they will do what they want, or what they love. I sure can't say that I love what I do (money making wise) but like I've said before I am living my dream. I have the family I wished that I would have. Some days I take that for granted when I am tired or not feeling well but I still got what I wanted out of life so far. I hope my children accomplish the same!

More is better

Everyone thinks I'm crazy. I have 3 children 3 and under and they all wonder how I do it. Sometimes I wonder myself how the heck I pull off having 3 happy, wonderful children. Well I'll tell you how!

Having 3 is far easier than 2 and 1. I guess I didn't really get to experience only having one for a couple of reasons. When Austin was a baby I had to go back to work full time when he was just 2 months old. Don't get me wrong I wasn't upset by this. I enjoyed going back to work and having Grant stay home on parental leave. It worked out for the best. But unfortaunatly I did not get to be around Austin a lot from 2-10 months old because I was usually working. After that I worked opposite of Grant and have ever since he started plumbing. Austin was a dream, until he turned about 18 months old, which is very close to when Dalyce was born. There was so much going on with us buying our new house and me and Grant working full time jobs (opposite) that I didn't really get to enjoy Austin being a baby, plus I was pregnant and very tired all the time.

After Dalyce was born, they both became a big handful. Dalyce was just about the worst baby ever and Austin hit terrible 2's very fast. I think his terrible 2's was partially due to that new baby and him not getting as much attention as before. Dalyce was so difficult, I could barely put her down because she would scream the whole time. I'm pretty sure that because she's a girl thats why she was like that. But on the other hand it might have been me wanting to hold her all the time, but then it got inconvienient for me. So having 2 was tough because I not only had a terrible 2 year old to look after but a very difficult baby.

And then there were 3...what was I thinking? It is actually turning out to be very easy in deed. I was extremely worried because I remembered what it was like with Austin and Dalyce. But then Drayper was born, the easiest baby ever. Austin and Dalyce keep each other entertained while I attend to Drayper, which is easy because he only ever crys when he's hungry. Other than that I seem to have some free time (so I'd like to think). Free time is cleaning, cooking, dressing children, doing laundry, and everything else a mother and wife needs to do.

I thought I didn't want anymore kids after I had Drayper. Even up to a couple weeks after he was born I still said no way. But every now and then I wonder what it would be like to have 4. I would be EXTREMELY crazy but it is duable. We would adjust our lives (just like we have for the other 3) and it would be just fine I'm sure. I still don't think that it would be the best idea ever but its duable. Drayper being the easiet baby on the planet made me think that having another wouldn't be so bad. I almost wish he wasn't so easy so this thought of having another would get out of my head. I don't think, after my last pregnancy, that I could handle being pregnant again.

So there you have it. This is how I handle having 3 very young children. I have 2 kids who entertain each other (for the most part) and a baby who is so easy to take care of. It is easy to take care of 3 kids as long as thats all you are doing all day every day, but of course thats not all I do. After you add in keeping up on the cleaning and cooking it gets a little harder. But I also have the best husband ever to help me out. He does work a full time very demanding job so I don't expect him to do much, but then again he doesnt expect much out of me either. If the house isnt clean or supper isnt ready when he gets home, he doesnt care because he knows what I do every day, and I do the most important job ever.

Living for your children...

Before you have children what did you do? Well for me it wasn't much. I knew at a very young age that all I wanted was to be a mom so I never went to post secondary school to further my education and pursue a career. I knew I didn't want to do this because then what would I do when I did have kids. For me and my beliefs I wouldn't be able to have my career and raise my children. In the future I may go back to school for something that I love to do but for now my life is all about my children.

I started to realize that everything I do is all about them and for them. Before I had kids I could do anything I wanted at any time. I didn't have any one to worry about but myself. But even in those days I didn't do everything I wanted because I knew something was missing. Now that I have kids my whole day is surrounded by their schedule. We have a routine and right now it works for all of us. Every day is pretty much the same. In the morning we get up and have breakfast, then the kids play while I have my coffee and play a few games on the computer. Then we go upstairs and I have my shower and get ready for the day and then I get the kids ready. After we come downstairs and sometimes there is more time to play but sometimes we just eat lunch and then they go down for their naps. During their naps is my downtime. I usually wait until they are in bed to eat because it is more peaceful. I usually watch TV while I eat. After I'm done eating and done watching TV I wait. I wait until the kids get up. This is when I started to realize that my whole life revolves around them. I dont try to occupy my time, I just wait. I don't know why I sit and wait, I could find something to do that I enjoy doing but I don't. As soon as Dalyce wakes up, I go and get her and both of us get so excited to see each other.

I spend time trying to teach them new things and to give them all the potential to be the best that they can be in life. I think of things that they need in order to grow. I think of things that they could use in order to learn. I think of their future and what I could do to help them. I think of Austins preschool and teams that I could put him in. I think of Dalyce and what she could do in a few years.

I work in order to pay for the things that they need and want. I work to provide for them (However I couldn't get by without my loving husband). I make sure that they have enough food, a roof over their head, and clothes on their back (which sometimes is too many clothes). I work to provide things that they don't need but want but don't know it yet.

I could've not had kids. I could've just decided not to do any of these things. I wonder sometimes what my life would be like. I wonder if I would've travelled. I could've gone so many places and done so many things. I decided to have kids and to be a mom and to have a family. Nothing compares to a childs laugh or smile, a new word or trick that they've learned. I could've travelled the world and seen things and done things but then I wouldn't have the joys in my life that I do. I forget what its like to have nothing to worry about but yourself but to me thats the best thing in the world. I love my children with all my heart and I hope they will be wonderful people. I think sometimes that is why I am so hard on them without knowing it. I am a wonderful mom because I am providing for them exactly what they need, not only material things but the love that they need in their hearts. If I didn't say it every day (which I do because it is important for them to hear it) they would know that I love them. And one day, when they have children of their own, they will realize everything that I have done and will do for them just like I have my own parents. They are the most important things in my life no matter what and I will do everything in this world to protect them. Even the unborn!

Potty Training...

Austin is (Hopefully) finally potty trained.

Potty training is one of (so far) the most frustrating things to have to do with raising children, well my child anyways. I have been trying to potty train Austin for almost a year, on and off, now. I have tried everything from leaving him naked running around the house to asking him every 20 minutes if he has to go potty to now where I just quite cold turkey and he is not allowed to wear diapers anymore (not even pull ups) except at night time only. It took a lot out of me over the past few months trying to figure out why he wouldn't use the potty. I didn't understand why he was being so difficult and I came to every conclusion possible. I finally figured it out! I think that what I did would not work with every child, just mine (well maybe others). I think that my stuborn side rubbed off on him and he was ttrying to see how far he could push me! Well he pushed me to figure out how to potty train him once and for all.

Last fall (I believe) when Austin was just about 3 I decided to try to actively start potty training him. I started out by leaving him naked around the house. It started to work for the first few days. He never peed on the floor and always went to the potty when he had to go. I would put him in a pull up when we went somewhere and at nap time. He still wore diapers at bed time. For a couple of weeks I thought it was working. Going to the store he would sometimes ask to go to the potty and sometimes he wouldn't. At nap time he would not ask to go to the potty ever and he would always wake up with a dirty diaper. I figured that maybe that was ok and at least during his awake time he was going (sometimes). And then one day everything went backwards...He peed on the floor. I thought it would happen just the once and then it kept happening, so we went back to full time diapers.

A few months went by and we tried again. Sometimes I would put him in underwear, sometimes I would leave him in a diaper and sometimes I would leave him naked. Nothing seemed to be fully working. It would only seem to work when we were at home. At that point I kind of gave up on the whole thing even though I knew Austin was smart and he knew when he had to go pee and poop.

I started getting super annoyed with changing austins bum and asked him why he can't just go in the potty. He would always say he didn't want to. So I came to the conclusion that he was just lazy.

During being pregnant every once in a while you have a melt down. Well I had one of those a couple weeks ago about Austin. About him not being potty trained, never listening to me and just being a 3 year old boy. So I searched on the internet hoping for some answers and help. Well I found it, with some of my own ideas combined.

I decided to make Austin quite diapers cold turkey. The website I read this on made a lot of sense in that if you keep going back and forth between not wearing diapers and wearing them it confuses them and they dont want to learn. Well with Austin, he knew what he was supposed to do he just didn't want to. So I told him no more diapers except at bed time, even naps were no diapers. He wasn't happy with this but he did it. There were two times where I wasn't sure what to do but apparently what I did I was right. Once he was sent to his room for doing something bad and he decided to pee his pants. I knew that he had done this on purpose so I made him stay in his peed in pants. That was his punishment for not telling me he had to go pee, he had to stay in his wet pants. Now I only made him stay in them for about 10 minutes. The other time he peed in his pants during his nap. Now he was still awake and he did it on purpose because he wanted out of his bed. Well little did he know I made him stay in his wet pants and made him have a nap. I know that you are all thinking that I am cruel for doing this, but it worked. He hasn't done that since and he has told me if he has to go. He is smart and knows that I can hear him when he is in bed (yes I still have a monitor in his room and his door has a child thing on it because he comes out of his room all the time unless the door thing is on and he can't get out). He hasn't had an accident since last Sunday (which that accident was on purpose) and last saturday we spent almost the entire day at a friends house and peed in their potty 3 times without me asking if he had to go, he just went!! I am so happy about his progress and I firmly believe I could take him any where and he would not have an accident! I am so proud of both of us for sticking to it. I may have made some mistakes along the way but that is part of being a parent. Now onto other things, potty training Dalyce, she is eager to learn and nighttime training with Austin, Oh and having another baby!!!

Embrace Life

So you are sitting there one day thinking that everything in your life is absolutely perfect. Perfect husband, perfect kids, perfect house, everything in your life is everything you dreamed of, and then it comes crashing down on you. In just a few seconds, a few words are said to you that might change your life forever. Overwhelming information to get by yourself. A million thoughts start running through my head and I can't help but wonder, What did I do wrong? You try to tell yourself that it doesn't matter. That it is just another bump in the road that you can get through it with love and support. Still, it's very scary all the same and you have no idea what to do. It is what you were given. Take it, accept it, embrace it. However hard it might be.

Only 4 months away!

Well baby #3's due date is fast approaching. Only 4 short months away. However I think it will be only just over 3 months away, but that is my opinion! I said to Grant yesterday I don't know how much longer I can take being pregnant. My body I think is telling me that it is not a factory! But only 4 months. It seems like 4 months ago seems so far away but thats only because a lot has happened. Grant pointed out that 4 months ago we were out camping for the last time that summer. That does seem like a long time ago but the next 4 months I think will fly by. There's not a lot thats going to happen between now and then besides Grant going to school. In 4 months I would love to have bought a bunk bed for Austin and Dalyce and have them sleeping in the same room. I don't think this is going to happen though. The Bunk bed might be bought but the kids won't be sleeping in the same room. Dalyce won't be quite old enough to sleep in a regular bed and getting them to sleep in the same room I think is going to be a disaster!

I have an ultrasound again on the 13th. We still don't know what we are having and I don't know if we'll find out. We still have quite a bit of time to request to know! We are having a tough time deciding on names (once again). Anyone have any great suggestions?